I found this from December 2015, while clearing old documents from my Dropbox. No idea what I was thinking when writing it.
There is a debt we all must pay. Some call it the debt of past lives, others, the burden of past actions and yet others, fate. There are some truths all of us must discover; the way of life, to move on from one phase to the next. Until those debts are paid consciously and the truths discovered, lies unlearned and the way of being put into practice, we continue bouncing off the harsh pillars of failure; the griefs of relationships lost, the sorrows of relationships yet to begin, the apathy of stubborn, failed ventures, the despair of dreams unfulfilled.
We pass through life, some of us observing the pillars our paths collide with, others oblivious to our changed trajectories, some of us learning and others passing on just as close to the truth as the day they were born, their debts as yet unpaid, sure to start all over.
It appears to be about happiness, which I believe to be an illusion; a momentary flash in the larger context of our species. A fulfilling of our desires is all it presents itself to be – wealth, love, recognition, power, possessions and other toys to pacify us for the time being. Some find panacea in control, some in the pursuit of science and yet others in the search for philosophies that claim to explain.
Knowledge of the debt is one thing, paying it is another. So is the case with learning the path to the truth and finding the will to follow it. And then we have the general state of awareness, which manifests itself in varying degrees, some stating truths, others tainted by personal complexes; the greater the degree of awareness, the lower the taint of perception, the purer the truth realized.